Drones

This was the same women on a trip to Belgium, shit in the bidet thinking it was a foreign type of bog! 🙄 

Beats shitting the bed I spose. 🤔 

Been there done that, to my embarrassment, in Marseilles when I went back to the hotel with a Vietnamese whore and rushed in for a shit in the gloom, shat in the bidet and then spent 10 minutes trying to push it down the holes, not thinking of picking it up and dumping it in the proper bog because I was pissed. Oh how we laughed about it when I got back to The Shot! 🤥 

Ideal conditions fer avin a sloppy shite Pat! 😆 

As Denzil said to Jethro, "That bloke over there has shit himself,he is walking very peculiar,why is that ?" Jethro said, " That is because,he hasn't finished yet" 😀

🤣 🤣 

Anybody had those M&S cooked Chicken thighs? taste great but don't half give you terrible smelly farts! 🤮 

I don't need to eat anything posh from M+S to make my farts smell, it's just a natural talent I was born with! 😎 

Thi named "Johny Fartpants" in Viz after thee Pat! 😆 

I remember giving somebody tea made from Kenny Everett fart powders and Dr Crapperlots tea bags.After a while the result was a fart that sounded like ripping sailcloth on the Flying Dutchman in a severe gale,and a follow through which defied belief!

He never did find out what caused it. It's only by experimenting that you find out how things work!

😀

On a visit to the Scots Guards camp in Munster I tipped 100 ground up Sennakot tablets in the breakfast tea urn and scooted back to Osnabruck. Never did hear about the result but I'm sure it would've amused me! Al Boardman poisoned the platoon commander on an exercise on Salisbury Plain with the same stuff after getting pissed off with him grabbing his brew and f.cking off to briefings with it. He ended up on a drip, dehydrated after shitting himself inside out! Laughed? We almost shat, well he did anyway! 🤣 

Peas puddin also giz thi a gud clear out! 🤧 

The platoon commander in question asked about the suspiciously green tinge to the brew and was told some pea soup had been made in it beforehand. It seemed to taste all right to him, and he didn't pick up on the fact nobody took his offer when he tried to pass it round the group. Thick twat deserved it, and learned his lesson, practically developing a brew phobia! 🤣 

Pease pudding I love it Dave, but you could fart for England afterwards!