WONDER?

Just hopin she grows out of it Bob, in the meantime she,s almost got through the outside garden furniture sofa! 😖 

Dave stand by when she craps mate, you could end up with enough to make good quality chipboard! 🤣 

Or use it to burn like the Arabs do with camel shit, could cook yer sunday dinner on Daisy's wooden turds! 🤣 

It,s Lizzy the Staff who eights furniture Pat and shits logs n farts rhe sweet smell o pine!

Give my apologies to Daisy for my scurrilous false accusation Dave, and carry on collecting lizzy's wooden turds for the fire! Might be an idea to get some cast iron legged furniture to blunt her gnashers! 🤣 

An apt description Dave, perhaps one of these air freshener firms could purchase the patent of you mate, make a fortune!

Gorra cage fer the Staffy pup Lizzie Bob, weera purra if she,d bein too much of a fukker. She spends er time in theer tryin ta chow thru the metal! Might try er on 6 inch nails n gerrer trained up fer the circus! I ad a mate who after wrappin up iz german band in a towel cud punch a 6 inch nail reight thru a 4 X 4 solid piece o timber. Eee cud also chow a 6 inch nail in ayfe. Tha dint want im bitin thi lugs or sneck!

Sounds like Desperate Dan, Anybody who upset him would be in deep trouble Dave. 🤣 

Owd Brian wuz a wrestler Bob, built like a brick shithouse n worked az a navvy durin the day, plus working az a beez winger around the local workingmens clubs n went wi the name az Max Churchill. Used ta piss mesen laffin when after a workout eed say, "A berra fukk off al bi late fer mi singin lessons!"

Dave, you meet some characters during the course of a lifetime mate. I remember old Dobbin at the pit, nicknamed because he was half man and half horse the size of his Jake said it all. He was crossing a conveyor belt one day which had a broken roller his Jake was hanging out through a split in his trousers, which got entangled in the broken roller causing a lot of blood but no real damage. But Dobbin was crying out with fright me cock's gone! Old Jimmy the Deputy said your alright Dobbin it's lost neither girth nor length! And promptly put a bandage on it, and filled in an accident report which went to the Sister in the MI room. She sent it to the pit Manager asking him to get jimmy to rephrase it. The Pit Manager called old Jimmy in and said, "Listen Jim, for nature of injury you have written Cut Cock, I'm going to ask you to change that to lacerated penis. Jimmy replied now listen Mr Lang, Dobbin had a cut cock, I know nothing about that lacerated penis thing. So cut cock stays on that report! 🤣 🤣 🤣