RAT CATCHER

The expression rat catcher puts me in mind of one of the best books I've ever read, really enjoyable and informative, called Tales of a Rat Hunting Man, by a bloke called Brian David Plummer. If you can get hold of a copy, and there are lots of copies for sale on Amazon etc, you won't regret it. He uses ferrets, terriers, and even a lurcher, and some of the people he's met deep in the darkest English countryside can only be described as eccentric in the extreme. One of the people he wrote about used to bite live rats to death in the pub, as his party piece. Reminds me of the Gully Gully man I was told about, who used to come on the ship at Port Said, before going through the Suez Canal, who would swallow a drugged live rat, then regurgitate it, still alive. I stress, I never actually witnessed that, but was told about him by the bosun, whilst watching another Gully Gully man doing his stuff, ie magic tricks, which were bloody good. 

One of the best I,ve seen is a gymnast on top of a wobbly table doing a one handed handstand just using his forefinger stuck in the neck of an empty beer bottle to carry all his bodyweight. Much later he told me the secret but could never master it!

Read a great book called Chaffinches while over at the stepson's stag weekend, about country living in Suffolk between the mid 19th century and about 1938. Can't remember the writer but excellent read, a lot of it written in the local dialect which took some getting used to in parts and involved ferreting and hare coarsing with lurchers etc.

THat,s very common in Rural areas up Norf Pat but plod allus on the lookout for geezers participating which allows me ta gu under the radar wi the owd urdy gurdy.

A bloke I knew was in hospital having a hernia repair, the bloke in the next bed was a farmer who had been bitten on the bollock when a rat ran up his trouser leg. He said they heard this effeminate voice saying we will be there shortly dear. And this male nurse appeared mincing along pushing some poor old sod who wanted a piddle. He said we were both in agony with laughing, but to add insult to injury the effeminate nurse reported them to the matron for laughing at him. And they both received a severe bollocking from the Matron!

Fukkin ell Bob, imagine a ladyboy avin ta check thi knob n ballbag?Think ad rather fukk off n pour some some old spice on it, then time mesen duin the 800 metres!! 😩 

That old aftershave burns like hell if you get it on your   nuts Dave. Remember on a course at Chatham, just come out the shower laying on my pit bollocky buff. And Chris Read walked by and squirted aftershave on my nuts. Thought some twat was using a blow torch on them!

Tha cud do wi some o that on at the the start o the 100 metres Bob 😱

Could have run to the North Pole and kicked a polar bear of his iceberg to rest my nuts on it if I could Dave!

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣