TOM TOM

[Dave Burgess]

Ad a reight f.ckin laff last Friday. Invited to a nephews wedding in a posh hotel on the outskirts of York, the "trouble" not trusting me mag to f.ckin grid skills bought one o them Tom Tom f.ckin things ta mek sure we got theer oreight.
Kick off 12 noon, so sets off at 10am to give us bags o time, so No1 navigator sets the f.ckin thing and orft we jolly well go.
12 - 15 with the "trouble" pulling her hair out, the super duper latest technology guides us to a chip shop in a lay by on the A19 York selby Rd. Double reight fer me cos I wuz starvin Hagler, so whil,st the "troubles" asking directions I,m stuffin me boat race wi a big f.ck off bag o jockey,s whips.
Coorse it,s f.ckin earache time, she wunt even shurrup when I offered her a chip. F.ckin Women!
Eventually gets to our destination as the ceremony has just finished, so first into the beer garden fer free champers, lubbly jubbly.
Great sit down scoff and too many pints, so I let the "trouble" drive us back up to Durham following the instructions of f.ckin Tom Tom, whil,st I doss down in the back.
Who the f.ckin ell is this Tom Tom geezer anyway?
wedding 025.jpg

[Pat Harley]

Re: TOM TOM

Never mind Tom Tom,who's the dolly girl in the red dress with the humongous gazongas?

[taff]

Re: TOM TOM

Is Dave in the photo

[Dave Burgess]

Re: TOM TOM

F.ckin ell lads, wall to wall young tash with plenty o tits n arse in abundance, bastard being an owd twat!

[billy meikle]

Re: TOM TOM

F.ckin ell lads, wall to wall young tash with plenty o tits n arse in abundance, bastard being an owd twat!

looking good dave you an her who must be obeyed make a handsome couple

[billy meikle]

Re: TOM TOM

i almost forgot on my last visit to blighty to attend a c coy 1 para reunion albert used a tom tom to get to yorkshire and the tom tom could not figure out how to get there so we stopped at a gas station i bought a road map and got there the old fashioned way. i found out later that the tom tom did not have the latest maps in its program. i use tom tom here all the time and is very accurate. i update the inbuilt programme every 6 months if not i could end up in a chip shop in or a kebab goat house in canada

[Dave Burgess]

Re: TOM TOM

I aint much for modern technology Billy, I think the old tried and trusted methods are best. I don,t own a mobile phone, mainly cos I don,t understand how to work em, and what really pisses me off is when you meet someone you know in the street, stop for a chat, a f.ckin stupid noise erupts from their pocket, they immediately pull out their dog and bone, ignore you and start talking into the f.cker.
I just f.ck off at the double and leave the ignorant twats to it.
I remember as a bin lid when the demolition program started and families were moved from the inner city to edge of town housing estates, yad think f.ck all about walking 5 miles to call for a mate, only to be told by his mum when you got there that he was,nt in, so what? Just walk back again and think f.ck all about it. Imagine kids these days doing that? Allus got their hand stuck to their lug, probably talking to some mate whil,st he or she is avin a shit or summat.
I,m afraid the world has moved so fast in the last 50 years that I,ve bin left way behind. All is not lost though, I,m still pretty handy with a pick and shovel, and I can swing the 25lb sledge hammer with the best of em!

[bob9739]

Re: TOM TOM

Never mind Tom Tom,who's the dolly girl in the red dress with the humongous gazongas?

Beat me to it there Pat, make a fortune if she was in a colour Climax mag. Dave, looking good there mate in your best kit, Tuesday night I got a bollocking off wor lass because a wore a 9 squadron polo shirt to meet Kanaka at a pub in Dover, took no notice wore it anyway and had a great night out women have no dress sense !

[trubrit2411]

Re: TOM TOM

Beat me to it there Pat, make a fortune if she was in a colour Climax mag. Dave, looking good there mate in your best kit, Tuesday night I got a bollocking off wor lass because a wore a 9 squadron polo shirt to meet Kanaka at a pub in Dover, took no notice wore it anyway and had a great night out women have no dress sense !

Its right regal gear Bob. Hard earned mate

[billy meikle]

Re: TOM TOM

I aint much for modern technology Billy, I think the old tried and trusted methods are best. I don,t own a mobile phone, mainly cos I don,t understand how to work em, and what really pisses me off is when you meet someone you know in the street, stop for a chat, a f.ckin stupid noise erupts from their pocket, they immediately pull out their dog and bone, ignore you and start talking into the f.cker.
I just f.ck off at the double and leave the ignorant twats to it.
I remember as a bin lid when the demolition program started and families were moved from the inner city to edge of town housing estates, yad think f.ck all about walking 5 miles to call for a mate, only to be told by his mum when you got there that he was,nt in, so what? Just walk back again and think f.ck all about it. Imagine kids these days doing that? Allus got their hand stuck to their lug, probably talking to some mate whil,st he or she is avin a shit or summat.
I,m afraid the world has moved so fast in the last 50 years that I,ve bin left way behind. All is not lost though, I,m still pretty handy with a pick and shovel, and I can swing the 25lb sledge hammer with the best of em!

thats all ye need dave if yer happy wi what yer doin bugger everybody else. i have a cell phone just a cheap tracphone it has 4 numbers on it trubrit dave the monster tindal and wee mary. when i was running mega million dollar projects here in california i had 2 cell phones ye could nae go for a shitte without it ringing. the shitte people talkon cell phones is astounding i.e airports and people talking shitte and giggling ove r crap ye canni help but hear the crap they are talking. for work if yer a contractor like trubrit etc. a big scam on people who get addicted to them. good for security etc but a family plan 150 bucks a month put that on top of yer cable tv computer another 130 bucks soon builds up.

[Dave Burgess]

Re: TOM TOM

Yes Billy, all this techno stuff guz reight over me head, the kids and grandkids drive me crackers with it. They drive all the way up here to see us, then spend most of their time either talking on the f.cker or sitting on the sofa, head burried into it playing some f.ckin game or summat, even when the weather is nice outside. F.ckin ell, when me and me elder brother were bin lids, we were only ever in the gaff to eat and f.ckin sleep, not enuff hours in the day to play footy or cricket or gerrup to some mischief. Totally different world, and things aint changed for the better in my opinion, but then again, according to the young uns, I am a miserable owd TWAT!

[jackw102]

Re: TOM TOM

Nice picture Dave

[jim scott]

Re: TOM TOM

Dave,Thought you would hae bin a whiz kid on mobiles,after all the goodies you find wi yer auld Hurdy Gurdy metal detector

Yes Billy, all this techno stuff guz reight over me head, the kids and grandkids drive me crackers with it. They drive all the way up here to see us, then spend most of their time either talking on the f.cker or sitting on the sofa, head burried into it playing some f.ckin game or summat, even when the weather is nice outside. F.ckin ell, when me and me elder brother were bin lids, we were only ever in the gaff to eat and f.ckin sleep, not enuff hours in the day to play footy or cricket or gerrup to some mischief. Totally different world, and things aint changed for the better in my opinion, but then again, according to the young uns, I am a miserable owd TWAT!

[Dave Burgess]

Re: TOM TOM

Dave,Thought you would hae bin a whiz kid on mobiles,after all the goodies you find wi yer auld Hurdy Gurdy metal detector

Like I sed Jim, ya don,t need an all singing all dancing machine that costs a f.ckin fortune for all the computer gadgets that are attatched. When I first started, I kcked off with the "FANTASTIC" GARRATT 150, basic but shit hot. Piss easy even fer a thick c.nt like me to use, and found some BRILL stuff. So like most people, getting greedy I thought, "If I get a more expensive machine, surely I,ll find the Golden Hoard". How f.ckin wrong I was, spent 500 quid for a machine that I would have had to tek to a brain surgeon to find out how to use the f.cker reight! Too computerised on a gadget that is basically a mine detector with discrimination facility. So after 3 years with no better finds than before, in fact less, back to the trusted Garrett and decent finds.
Like I allus say, "Basic Is Best", mind you that could be my excuse fer being a thick f.cker!

[HappyJack]

Re: TOM TOM

Great photo Dave, and you with a tie.
Bet you had Val put it on for you. Its ages since I wore a tie although I still do the double knot.
What was that called again?
Charmaine came to see us and spent a night in our rig, when we were close to home.
I asked, how the heck did you find us without a satnav?
Oh it was easy dad, I used the mobile phone.