• Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread SLAP in Jokes
    Mate sed, "Me Missis iz gerrin a bit kinky in er owd age. She sez she wants mi ta gi er a gud slap when we,re avin the lego,er. She sez it...
    0 replies | 3 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    10 Hours Ago
    Cost a fortune from that era Pete.
    2 replies | 35 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    10 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Statistic in Jokes
    Gud one Ian!
    1 replies | 10 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    10 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Robot in Jokes
    Gud one Ian!
    1 replies | 11 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    10 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread SEXUAL in Jokes
    Mate sed eeez seekin elp fer sexual abuse, or a defence lawyer az it,s moor commonly known.
    0 replies | 8 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    1 Day Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread ARMS in Jokes
    Teld mi mate, "Naa den pal, a saw a geezer purriz desert farms around yer owd lass in the battlecruiser last neet!" "Fukk off, thaa lyin...
    0 replies | 14 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    1 Day Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread PROCTOCOLOGIST in Jokes
    Ad an appointment wi the Proctocologist last week about the results o mi colonoscopy. Eee gave mi the thumbs up, so not only do I know fukk all...
    0 replies | 18 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread INTERNET in Jokes
    Internet dating, the odds o gud, but the goods are often fukkin odd!
    0 replies | 16 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread News you can use.... in Pictures
    Remember them owd battlecruiser days wi them disco light bulbs? Every fukker looked like they,d gorra serious case o dandruff!
    17 replies | 197 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread AEROBICS in Jokes
    Great days Tone, like you I started in my early teens training with the owder ruff geezers who,s worldly converations were a real eye opener fer a...
    4 replies | 37 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread LIFT in Jokes
    I called the Emergency line from the lift, n the operater asked "where are you stuck" I replied, "I,m not, just turn this fukkin Chrimbo music...
    0 replies | 13 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread News you can use.... in Pictures
    Ice age, Lions n Tigers in thi garden n the odd Wooly Mammoth trampin on thee flowers. Earths climate n conditions av bin constantly changin fer...
    17 replies | 197 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    The fresh aroma o true luv I reckon Pat!
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread AEROBICS in Jokes
    Paul wa a brill lad Tone, built like a brick shithouse n strong az fukk, I think he hailed from Oldbury, like you a black country lad. Remember...
    4 replies | 37 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread CHINESE in Jokes
    Mate sed, "When mi split link tash fukked mi off, a kunt find mi way back ta mi gaff. I wuz fukkin disoriented!"
    2 replies | 21 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    Duz tha sooth er wi thi farts Pat?
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    Same owd rule applies when it comes ta tash,"Wots theirs iz theirs n wots thine iz theirs!"
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread AEROBICS in Jokes
    Mate went ta join up fer aerobics classes n the tash instructer asked im ta wear loose fittin clobber. "Fukkin ell!" eee sed, "If ad gorrany...
    4 replies | 37 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    Dun that Tone!
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    In my case, the fukkin slammer!
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread SNOW WHITE in Jokes
    Got talkin ta the little lass who lives across the roo-ad on er way oo-am from skoyl n asked, "Wots tha bin duin at skoyl taday luv?" "Reading...
    2 replies | 37 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    Fukkin DEFINITELY Pat!
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread RETAINED in Jokes
    Gorra very rare compliment from the "Trouble" today when she teld mi, "You,re almost 73 and unbelievably you,ve managed to maintain your looks. You...
    19 replies | 77 view(s)
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2 Visitor Messages

  1. View Conversation
    Dave. Can you give me a bell on my mob: 07810820763 and I'll phone you back, think I have your num wrong.
    John
  2. Older than I,d like to be,not as fit as I used to be,married for 44 years to Val,my lover and best friend,without her I,d be either locked up or brown bread.Dad,grandad & great grandad,children really are the greatest thing you can posess,keep ya mind young & daft and keep ya body active.After 65 years on this earth and years studying the university of life which included leaving school with f.ck all in the way of qualifications,being sacked aged 17 from an indentured apprenticeship for banjoing the gaffer,6 years in the Parachute Regiment,digging the roads with the paddys,driving heavy plant,roofing contractor,gym owner and finally a postman.After that f.ckin lot I have gained a great insight into life and all the characters that go to make it up,and my conclusion is that some people are put on this earth to make people happy,whil,st others have a burning desire to make people miserable,so in my experience when you come across these twats,the only answer,"one right on the end of the old violin!"
    And finally the motto I live by is summed up in the song which is sung at the very end of that brilliant piss take film.
    "ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE!
Showing Visitor Messages 1 to 2 of 2
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