• Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread CONSOLE in Jokes
    drinking1Mate sed iz Missis came oo-am from work in tears n asked im ta console er, so eee twatted er wi iz X Box.:stupid:
    0 replies | 10 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    19 Hours Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread BRASS NAIL in Jokes
    drinking1Wuz just about ta fukk this brass nail when I sed, "Thall av ta excuse mi luv, I ant dun this fer a long time." "Widower?" she...
    0 replies | 18 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    1 Day Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread RECOVERING in Jokes
    drinking1Mate teld mi eee wuz a recoverin alcoholic. Worree means iz the kunts gorra fukkin angover!:stupid:
    0 replies | 22 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    1 Day Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Kids in the 60's in Pictures
    It wuz a Corporation slum Tone, built fer the steel n cutlery workers early 1800s, one or two in our street still ad gas light. Moved out inta one o...
    46 replies | 2602 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    1 Day Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread PALMIST in Jokes
    drinking1A mate o mine went ta see a Palm Reader n asked, "Can tha tell mi when I,ll meet mi soul mate?" Palmist replied, "Never!" ...
    0 replies | 35 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Kids in the 60's in Pictures
    Ours wuz a back ta back gaff, one room downstairs, one bedroom n then up ta the attic weer our kid n me dossed. We ad a coyl cellar as well n the...
    46 replies | 2602 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread SHORT in Jokes
    drinking1Fancied a Brandy last neet so sed ta the barmaid, "Double Brandy please." "Sorry we,re short staffed", she replied. ...
    0 replies | 49 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Kids in the 60's in Pictures
    Brickies these days wunt bi able ta build a "Bulls Eye", n wunt know the difference between Flemish Bond n Brooke Bond!
    46 replies | 2602 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    2 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread LEAVE in Jokes
    drinking1Mate sed, "I can,t fukkin believe that me Mother In Law persuaded me missis ta leave mi. N just ta think, all these years I...
    0 replies | 41 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread IQBAL in Jokes
    drinking1Owd Iqbal teld mi, "My Mum brought 15 of us single handed. She got caught fukkin shoplifting in Saudi Arabia!":stupid:
    0 replies | 54 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread INTERNET in Jokes
    "My heart belongs to you Clamidea". :stupid:
    2 replies | 118 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    3 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread MISS in Jokes
    drinking1Az I gerrowder, a miss me Missis moor than ever. Me reactions o fukkin shite these days!:stupid:
    0 replies | 40 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread INTERNET in Jokes
    drinking1Bin lids o teld not ta meet strangers they talk to on the internet in case the bent bastards wanna av sex with em. Adults deffo...
    2 replies | 118 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    4 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread MOTHER in Jokes
    drinking1Mate sed, "Me missis gets moor like er fukkin mother every day!" Now she,s started complainin about me foorcin er ta suck mi...
    0 replies | 64 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Kids in the 60's in Pictures
    Memories fer me o playin footy agee-anst the next street in a local graveyard weer all the gravestoo-ans wo them that wo laid flat ta the deck wi...
    46 replies | 2602 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Out and about in Pictures
    Looks a brill place Jack.
    573 replies | 88815 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread EX in Jokes
    drinking1Mate sed, "I wish mi ex cud look down from heavan n see mi now. But bastard! The kunts still alive!":stupid:
    0 replies | 48 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess replied to a thread Scottish Bloke in Jokes
    :very_drunk:
    4 replies | 145 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    5 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread UPSET in Jokes
    drinking1A mate o mine wuz really upset when eee received a text from iz new tash that read, "I,m sorry I,m breaking up with you because your knob is...
    1 replies | 91 view(s)
  • Dave Burgess's Avatar
    6 Days Ago
    Dave Burgess started a thread JAP in Jokes
    drinking1Yank mate o mine opened a door fer a Japanese geezer, n Jap sed, "Sank You". Mate twatted im n sed, "Jap bastard bringin Pearl...
    0 replies | 61 view(s)
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2 Visitor Messages

  1. View Conversation
    Dave. Can you give me a bell on my mob: 07810820763 and I'll phone you back, think I have your num wrong.
    John
  2. Older than I,d like to be,not as fit as I used to be,married for 44 years to Val,my lover and best friend,without her I,d be either locked up or brown bread.Dad,grandad & great grandad,children really are the greatest thing you can posess,keep ya mind young & daft and keep ya body active.After 65 years on this earth and years studying the university of life which included leaving school with f.ck all in the way of qualifications,being sacked aged 17 from an indentured apprenticeship for banjoing the gaffer,6 years in the Parachute Regiment,digging the roads with the paddys,driving heavy plant,roofing contractor,gym owner and finally a postman.After that f.ckin lot I have gained a great insight into life and all the characters that go to make it up,and my conclusion is that some people are put on this earth to make people happy,whil,st others have a burning desire to make people miserable,so in my experience when you come across these twats,the only answer,"one right on the end of the old violin!"
    And finally the motto I live by is summed up in the song which is sung at the very end of that brilliant piss take film.
    "ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE!
Showing Visitor Messages 1 to 2 of 2
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